Three Tips to Keep in Mind When Diving in With a New Sexual Partner
Having a new sexual partner is exhilarating and exciting. Few things wake up our desire for exploration and passion more than diving into a new sexual dynamic. Still, it can be nerve-wracking or a little awkward getting over the hiccups of getting to know each other in this way.
You don’t have to go at this aimlessly. We’re here to help be your guide to getting to know a new sexual partner. Here are the top tips to keep in mind.
Cover The Basics.
As unsexy as it sounds, there are some logistical matters to discuss with your new flame. Sexual and emotional health are vital parts of a thriving sex life. So be sure to cover the basics.
Discuss testing and diagnoses around sexually transmitted infections, as well as what methods of protection you’re using.
If it applies to you, talk about what birth control or contraception methods you’re using. Have a plan A and B.
Talk about any reservations or triggers you may have so that you can both feel safe and comfortable in the experience.
Practice Honest Communication.
Communication is a critical part of any relationship, especially when you’re still getting to know each other. Communication isn’t just about logistics, it’s also a powerful tool you can use to deepen your connection and access to pleasure. The more upfront and honest you are, the greater your opportunity for connection.
Here are some starting off points:
What are both of your expectations? Are you looking for a long-term partner? A hook-up buddy? Open to anything? Discussing this helps prevent unnecessary hurt and lets you be more present with each other.
What are your turn-ons, turn-offs, fantasies, and desires? What areas on your body do you like to be touched (or not be touched)? Is there a sexual activity you’ve been wanting to explore? Toys you want to use? This conversation doesn’t have to be stale, it can be totally hot, and even be used as foreplay.
Say what’s on your mind and heart. Is there anything you need to get off your chest before you start getting sexual? Not everything needs to be disclosed right away, but if something is building up inside you it can get in the way of the connection and your pleasure.
Take Your Time.
It can be so tempting to want to dive in and go full force with a new sexual partner, but some things can’t be rushed. You both get to create your own timeline for the relationship, but also understand that things take time to simmer. Especially when it comes to human connection and your comfort levels with each other.
You might feel like you’re floating on cloud nine, but work to stay grounded through practices like breathwork and connecting to your body. These practices carry over and help you be more comfortable with your new partner. Oh, and most importantly? Enjoy the process!